An old boss and I used to joke regularly about my tendency to walk into cubicle walls. Protective thermostat covers are the bane of my existence… I will walk into one if it’s within a five-mile radius. I have fallen off sidewalks and sprained ankles, or even fallen face-first in a parking lot with nothing around me. My teams have kept journals of “Kimberly-isms” that are full of odd phrases and random nonsense that I have said (pearls of wisdom are far less common).
In an earlier post, I made mention of owning your quirks. When I meet new employees, particularly those who are entry level positions or are showing signs of nervousness, I make jokes about these things and other quirks of character. For me, it’s important that I show these small funny bits of personality to those around me. And not because I am trying to be a humorous person. It’s a small way to humanize myself and show my personality, particularly because I’m not very prone to talking about my personal life at work.
The Challenge of Fewer Interactions & Separation Between Organization Hierarchies
As you progress through an organization, or as you interact less frequently with a variety of people across the teams, it can become harder for people to approach you for open discussion. Particularly as you progress up a hierarchy inside an organization, there starts to come a potential for fear of the title more than the person. I’ve personally experienced this, despite my efforts to put people at ease. There are still those who tense up when “the boss” is around, or they get nervous if I schedule a meeting or say I want to chat. Even within my own organizations, if it is a first “skip-level” meeting with someone in my downstream, I have had people display nervousness even when I explain in advance why I want to have a chat.
And lest you think that I am an intimidating person (despite some rumors to the contrary, I try really hard not to be!), I have heard similar tales affecting other leaders. Even comments from one member of management to another after meeting with a someone from the executive team: “Wow – he’s a regular guy!” The title and the person had become intertwined, and intimidation sets in even before the first interaction.
This is where I take advantage of the small, funny quirks of my nature. Discussing and displaying traits that add humility acts as a disarming mechanism. It allows us to speak on more equal footing, and starts to break down the barriers by demonstrating items that others can relate to.
You Don’t Have to Be the Most Important Person in the Room
It is important to keep a sense of humility and approachability. Aside from talking about the odd ways that I injure myself, I also try to explain my personal philosophies. As a senior leader, when I am giving “welcome aboard” chats with groups of new hires, I talk about how I am not the most important person in the room. I am just one person. The most important people are those who are fundamental to the success of our business – the “doers,” the “achievers,” and the “dreamers” (and maybe the candlestick makers). The people with some of the best ideas on how to fix things are the people who see the issues day in and day out. Without a service person to talk to our customers every day, we wouldn’t need service leaders. Without sales teams to push our products, we wouldn’t need product teams. Every person plays an important role in our organizations… and that leaves me well down the list of the “most important person” title nominees.
Understand that you are not your title, and don’t try to trade respect on your title. I accept my title, and the level of responsibility that comes with it, but I do not leverage the mentality of “the boss” when I interact with people… unless the occasion requires it. Instead, I’m the guide that helps others see the picture on the front of the puzzle box and helps them understand how the pieces interlock. When someone is stuck, I’m the voice to help “find the corner” to begin. If I were to become deeply wound into the idea that “I’m in charge” then it would be no wonder if my team struggled to bring ideas to me.
Humility Can Help People Connect
To help others move past the title, I look at ways to open my personality to them. I’m not one to discuss my family or the things I do outside of work with all of the people I work with. If this is your mechanism to connect with others, use it! For me, humility and humor are two of the easiest mechanisms within my personal toolbox. Employee engagement is a diverse discussion, and one worthy of far more than just a few thoughts in this writing. I encourage everyone to own your quirks, those things make you uniquely “you” and help you to connect with the people around you.
